"I don't get mad, I get even!" How many times have you heard that sentiment? Or, maybe you have said it yourself. Even if you were sort of kidding, there is a part of you that is serious. Beloved, this is not the attitude of a believer. If you read Romans 12:14-21 then you will see that God definitely does not want you seeking your own revenge.
We are to overcome evil with good according to verse 21. This verse is the summary statement of the preceding verses beginning in verse 14. God's prescription for us, His children, is never to seek revenge, but to turn and do the best thing for those involved.
Our attitude should be that of our Lord Jesus. He did the greatest thing by dying on the cross which was not a passive thing. Scripture says He laid His life down of His own choosing. He could have stopped the onslaught at any time, yet He knew in the long run His death was the necessary answer to God's wrath over sinful man. So, you too, need to take the harder road and seek to do good to those whose harm you. Yes, turning the other cheek is actually the right thing to do. You and I are to NEVER do harm to another person. First Corinthians even condemns believers for going to secular courts to resolve their disputes.
You are not a door mat, but you actively seek some way to do good when harm has been done to you. A door mat sits back and takes whatever is dished out to it. Christians, are not to just sit back and take it and then do nothing else. Believers are to get up and work harder to resolve the situation and/or do what is necessary for the honor of God.
Why should we work harder? Because we are brothers and sisters to one another. First Corninthians 6, a chapter dealing with lawsuits, chastises believers for going to the secular court to resolve their issues. WE ARE FAMILY. We have a father in heaven Who loves us and has given us the tools necessary to resolve conflict. Careful study's of Matthew 5 and 18 will help us to see these tools. But, what is important is that you are related to one another as long as you acknowledge God as Your Father. Much of New Testament language is wrapped in these words of family where God is our Father and we are brothers and sisters to one another.
Have you been causing dishonor by your retaliatory motivations? How have you been retaliating? Do you need to evaluate your actions towards those who have harmed you in any way? Continue to read Romans 12:14-21. Let the Word teach, correct, and train.